Monday, November 12, 2012

Rant: Vegetarian Biological Warfare

There may be a conspiracy at hand, a cabal of evil vegetarians engaged in biological warfare against those who enjoy the taste of meat. If you love sinking your teeth into a juicy steak or thick hamburger, consider the terror you would face if you suddenly found yourself allergic to meat. You could no longer savor a fine pork loin or leg of lamb. The idea sends shivers up my spine, a nightmare that would tear my life apart. And my fear possesses justification.

ABC News recently reported on a surge of meat allergies in the central and southern U.S. Galactose-alpha-1,3-galactose (alpha-gal for short) is a sugar carbohydrate found in red meat and people can become allergic to this carbohydrate. Some of the allergies have been relatively mild, only causing hives, while others have been far more serious, leading to anaphylactic shock. Something you love could suddenly turn out to be deadly and you would have to completely stop eating meat, becoming a vegetarian. The horror! The horror!

What is causing these meat allergies to affect adults? The primary suspect is the lone star tick, though a direct causal link has not been fully proven yet. Regions that have many of these ticks have seen large increases in meat allergies. It is suspected that the tick's saliva could be somehow triggering these allergies, causing a reaction to alpha-gal.

The lone star tick generally inhabits the southeastern and eastern regions of the U.S., so those in the western portion, as well as much of the northern portion, of the country are relatively safe from this tick. The tick can be found in Massachusetts, which is a reason for me to worry. I could deal with Lyme disease but definitely not acquiring a meat allergy.  

I think it is a plot by a cabal of evil vegetarian scientists who have genetically engineered a meat allergy disease and chose the ticks to be the carrier. They have given up trying to reason with people, trying to convince others of the benefits of vegetarianism. They have taken extreme measures. You can't trust those grass eaters!

Ok, maybe there isn't such a plot. But those damn ticks are real and they scare me. If you love meat, then follow this advice on avoiding ticks from the CDC. I will be following their suggestions.

3 comments:

sock in a toaster said...

That is horrifying! I will be even more tick conscious from now on!

Rich Mauro said...

Why blame it on vegetarians? Every one I know considers it a personal choice; not a mission to convert others. I would have preferred a different framing for the post. By the way, I eat meat.

Richard Auffrey said...

Rich,
That part was tongue in cheek. It was not intended to be serious.